This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
