If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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