i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
