My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
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