Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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