everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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