Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize
