so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
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