We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
