Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
