I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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