Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
