it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
