based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
