is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
