You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
