marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
your room smells of hookers.
And success
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
