I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
two words...techno handjob
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Randomize
