Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Drake has all the answers
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Randomize
