I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize