Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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