i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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