hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
