so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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