Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize
