hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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