Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize