I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
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