"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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