i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
