thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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