ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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