If that was your dad, he is hot
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
