absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
