Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
