Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Two words: nipple clamps
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