We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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