You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
