But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
