Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
