She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
