with your own penis?
I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
people are starting to question the shark bite story
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize