Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
