she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
