How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize