I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
