"it" just moved
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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