And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
