He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
she smelled like a LAN party
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
