No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize