the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
