and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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